10.13.2016

Sawyer Jeffrey

I had a baby. A perfect, angelic, sweetest little baby boy. Sawyer's in my arms as I  type this and it  all still seems so surreal and he is looking so big today I just want to cry. There's been a lot of crying around here lately. Surprisingly Mostly from me . The past 11 days have been the most precious and I will cherish them forever.  Sawyer came to us fresh from heaven a week late, way to test my patience kiddo.  His due date Saturday September 3rd (also the 4 year anniversary of mine and Jeffrey's engagement) came and went and I sat through church the next day and it seemed like everyone was staring with pitty. "Oh man she's still pregnant??"  The Tuesday before he came 3 days after his due date I went to the doctor and had my membranes stripped. Doctor Cole also checked my dilation. I was about 1-2 cm dialated and 90% effaced. This was good news but we set up a couple appointments in the following days to make sure little buddy was still doing well and an induction date just in case for a week from that day. I had such high hopes, well I was absolutely sure he was going to come early and here I was already 3 days past my due date. Having my membranes stripped hurt, but didn't put anything into action. Dr. Cole warned me that it might not do anything. But again I had such high hopes that it would! I totally set my self up for disappointment because Sawyer was coming on his own time. It was a hard couple of days. I still felt really great and was doing well. I was just upset that he wasn't here yet!


Friday September 9th I woke up and was instantly in a bad mood. My sisters and mom went on a walk and Jeffrey took Basil on his daily hike. And  I stayed home alone, left to my emotions. I walked into the nursery and sat done and just cried. I wanted my baby. I didn't want to wait anymore. I was so afraid that I wouldn't go into labor naturally and I dreaded being induced. After a few minutes I promptly said a prayer for patience and got over myself. Obviously he would come, at the right time, I just had to be patient.  I had an appointment at 12pm to monitor the baby; and all I could think about was his little heartbeat. I love love love that sound. (Sometimes I will get my stethoscope out and listen while he's sleeping ๐Ÿ™ˆ.)   At a quarter to twelve my mom Jeff and I loaded up and headed to the hospital. As we walked back to the L&D Room Connie the nurse told us that two women just had their babies. (Stab to my heart!!) I know a week late is nothing, but we had a schedule to maintain! ! My sisters we're leaving later that week. Connie hooked me up to the fetal monitor, which also detected contractions. We don't need that I said. But interestingly enough I was having pretty significant contractions, I just couldn't feel them. Hallelujah. The baby's heartbeat was perfect ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿผ He was just so comfortable inside!!  Dr. Cole came in  to chat and stripped my membranes again. This is not the most comfortable thing in the world let me tell you. After he was done I felt constant cramping, a good sign?? I sure hoped so! We went over our plan for Tuesday again, and both hoped it wouldn't have to come to that. My Doctor is pretty chill y'all. On our way home we stopped at Wendy's so  I could get a frosty. Yumm.  I had constant cramping but nothing that felt like any contractions. Jeff left for work around  4pm so I decided to take a nap and that's when I felt the cramping get stronger. I didn't tell anyone , I didn't want to jinx it so I just napped. Around 6 or so I woke up and was still feeling cramping/contractions. My mom and sisters were down stairs fixing dinner and I decided to just hang out and maybe eat something. At 7pm I started feeling the contractions come at regular intervals.  I even looked up at my mom during one and  got all red in the face and exclaimed that it hurt!! I planned for a natural birth and that moment I was a little worried about the pain. We started timing contractions. They were about 3 mins apart and about 30 seconds in duration. I  wanted to labor at home as much as I could before going to the hospital.  So I plopped down into my yoga ball and texted, then called Jeff to make his way back towards town and not to go to far. It was finally happening. My angel mother braided my hair in two French braids and. I hunkered down on my yoga ball and began concentrating on each contraction. We pulled out my birth affirmations as well so I could keep repeating those out loud. The contractions were painful but manageable with the yoga ball and my concentration. My little sister Sierra pulled out her guitar and started playing and singing. It was so relaxing! It helped me through the contractions more than she knew! She sang one song in particular that was so pretty. "Linger longer". Around 10:30 my contractions were still 3 mins apart but they were starting to last longer and longer. I called Jeff and told him it was time to go to the hospital. After that it was such a rush! Everyone started packing the car with our hospital bag, snack bag and pillows. All the while I was there bouncing on my yoga ball taking it one contraction at a time. Once Jeffrey arrived I said my goodbyes to my sisters and my mom, Jeff and I piled into the car.! I was so shaky on the (5min) ride to the hospital. Mostly with nerves and excitement, but I know some of those shivers were caused by pain.We pulled into the emergency room and hopped out of the car. I immediately had to pee. So I rushed into the bathroom and immediately had another contraction. I remember looking into the mirror and having to pinch myself, because I couldn't believe it. My baby was coming! As I hobbled back to the ER desk, we saw our neighbors walking out. Luckily everything was okay. It was so nice to see them and have them give me some encouraging words.  Another contraction hit and I had to sit down. They were getting stronger. Eek!
The nurses brought out a wheel chair and I gladly hopped right in. Why are wheel chairs still so fun?!  As they where wheeling me back the nurse said, "we had a feeling you would be back in tonight" I'm glad they did because I still was thinking my contractions were gonna stop and they would send me home.

We got to the room and they hooked me up to the fetal monitor and my dialation was checked. I was at a 4!! There was my babies' heartbeat, still perfect. Lying on the bed on my back was the worst. It made my contractions feel so much more painful! With each contraction now I could feel him squirm inside me. It was comforting yet worrying. I was constantly praying for him to be happy and healthy. I was hooked onto the monitor for about an hour and my contractions were getting stronger. I had my plan to get through each contraction but let me tell you it was so hard!! Jeff and my mom were my life savors. About every other contraction was really difficult for me to get through. If I wasn't concentrating,  focused and holding on to Jeffrey or my mom then all bets were off and it was
literally the worst pain!! I must say for the amount of preparation( and the lack thereof!) I did so well. I remember laying there getting my IV for some antibiotics, getting through the contractions one by one. Having jeff and my mom tell me to relax each part of my body was so helpful. After the IV was done and they were done monitoring me, the pain was getting pretty significant. My nurse checked me again and I was at a 7, officially in transition. Things were progressing quickly  and I hunkered down again to handle each contraction.
 After a while I was finally able to soak in the tub. Let me tell you I might just do a water birth next time. The heat of the water and the floating feeling was an instant relief of pain. I still felt the contractions but they were so much more manageable. Jeff sat in the bathroom with me for the hour or so I was in the water and just held my head up and rubbed my back. As the hour came to an end I started feeling more and more pressure and I was wanting to push. The nurse came in and said they wanted to check my dialation and also hook me up to the fetal monitor as well. I went back to the dreaded bed  and was checked. I was at a 9!! I was progressing so quickly. My baby was coming!!! Once the baby was monitored they took me off and said I could labor how ever I wanted to again, just not in the tub because I was so close and feeling like I needed to push. By that time I was feeling so exhausted and to afraid to move lest it should set off another contraction. Around this time I shamefully asked for somewhere in this time I screamed to have some medicine. My angel of a nurse totally changed the subject and offered to check my dialation again, because it might be way to late for an epidural. I'm so grateful to her for doing that. I would have been so dissapointed in myself.  I was checked again and was at a 9.5 the contractions were so strong and the only thing that got me through them was jeff and my mom. I can't not say enough how much support they gave me. My doctor was called and he arrived quickly after. Good thing our town is super tiny!! I was so grateful to see him too, I was so ready to start pushing. Also side note, I love my doctor. He is seriously the best. Dr. Cole checked me and I was at a fully dialated. As soon as he did I had a huge contraction and had to push.  He was great and told me to push in whatever position I wanted too. But at that point I just wanted to stay where I was and not move. Next time I will for sure push in a different position .  I pushed a total of about 5 times. Through each push I couldn't help but yell. Sorry to everyone in the room. I hope I didn't burst your eardrums!  I remember thinking "Clara shut up!! What if there is another mom in labor in the next room, you're probably freaking her out!" But I couldn't stop it totally helped release the pain.
I was offered the mirror to watch him come out but I couldn't even muster the energy to say that I wanted it or not.  Another thing I would do differently! I remember when Sawyer was crowing. Jeff was so excited!! I can see him baby! He said. He's got hair!! It was such a surreal moment.  Feeling him crown and then  one push later he slid out. What a relief I tell ya!  My angel boy was born on September 10th at 1:53am after a 6 hour labor and about 5  pushes. Any longer and I would have for sure caved and gotten pain meds. So thank you my angel for making it easy on me!  We delayed the cord cutting so the little buddy just laid at the end of the table for about a minute. During that time all I could think was that it was done, I was done and I had a freaking baby!!! Jeffrey cut the cord and then my sweet baby was placed on my chest. I'll never forget that feeling. He was so warm and smelled so good. I can't describe it. The best smell in the world. I just wanted him to stay on my chest and never leave. We were able to do skin to skin while I delivered the placenta and was stitched up. And ow!! They had to massage my stomach to help the placenta come out. My mom said it was really weird after I delivered the babe the contractions just stopped.  I remember holding him for the first time  and feeling so exhausted but explicitly happy. There are no words to describe it. He was fresh from heaven and so alert! He just had these huge open eyes and wanted to take it all in. I looked over to my doctor and mom and said " I'm tired y'all"  and everybody laughed. My voice was so hoarse and Jeff brrought me water and we all just stared at the sweetest little boy you ever saw. Jeffrey was exhausted too, its a lot of work being a Doula ๐Ÿ˜‚. He said "dear let's wait a few years for the next one." I was thinking " next one??? Are you kidding how am I supposed to do this again???" But as soon as I woke up a little while later I wanted another ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป. Give me all the babies!! My mom ended up leaving around 3 am when Doctor Cole was done and everyone was wrapping things up. Jeff laid down for a sleep, and my nurse Tiffany came over to see how baby was nursing. He latched on fairly well, but I had no idea what I was doing, so I'm not even sure it was right. He ended up eating for about 20 minutes on both sides. (A good eater, and a foreshadow on his growth i'm sure!) Baby and I ended up falling asleep. It was so comfortable having him on my chest, he was so warm and so peaceful. Around 5am the nurses came back in to weigh and measure him. We waited, so we could have a lot of skin to skin time. Thats when I had to get up. That part I hated. It literally looked like I had been stabbed or shot or something. And Hello! I still looked 6 months pregnant! I just had a baby did I not??? I got rinsed off and put some clothes on and they wheeled us into another room. It was a lot smaller, but had a better bed for Jeffrey to sleep on so that was nice. As soon as we got settled in, baby and I fell asleep again. The next day consisted of us staring at the baby in amazement. Amazement that he was ours and how perfect every single inch of him was. The nurses came in to check on us and I ordered everything and anything that looked good from the cafeteria! Room service, i tell ya. Dr. Cole came in and checked us both later in the day and told us we could go home that day! I was shocked but also so excited to get him home and sleep in our own bed. They did a few tests on baby and I learned how to hand express and feed him. My sisters came over to meet the baby and Savannah brought Lyla. I couldn't believe how big she now looked compared to my tiny little guy. Jeff and I spent the day resting and loving on our little babe. My mom came by around 5pm to help us start gathering things. We ended up leaving around 8pm. And Pam and Tom, Jeffs' parents were able to come and meet us at the hospital as we were leaving! I was so happy they were able to meet baby as well.   Now what to name him! I thought that I would have this epiphany on his name. That as soon as I saw him I would know his name. But nope! It was the strangest thing loving this little boy so much but not knowing his name or having a clue on what to call him.  Jeffrey and I had a few names picked out but I just wasn't feeling right about them. He didn't look like a Theodore( Teddy/Theo) or an Oliver.  To my shame and dismay we left the hospital with out naming him. Of course everyone had their two cents on what to name him. Nothing felt right!
The first night home was just as surreal. I placed his tiny body in his bassinet next to me, and set my alarm to feed him every couple of hours. He was sleepy and just wanted to snooze!  We didn't decide on a name until the Monday evening. We were this close to naming him Theodore but I finally put my foot down and said that it was right. After a lot of prayer, I was taking to my family about our list of names and the name Sawyer came up. It was one that Jeff and I both liked but it got pushed to the back burner.  But the more i said it the more I liked it. My mom was holding him at the time and said "Is your name Sawyer" and at that moment I looked over and my baby smiled! and that settled it. I called Jeff ( he had to go to salt lake for training)  and told him what had happened. Sawyer Jeffrey Ingersoll. We love you so so much!!

This day was the best of my life. And while my mom and Jeff will say it was pretty traumatic, I loved it and will definitely give birth naturally again.  We'll just have practiced and prepared a little bit more!



No comments:

Post a Comment

01 09 10